Archive for the ‘Education’ Category

Affirm Yourself

Sunday, December 14th, 2008

We always hear positive affirmations from people whenever we feel depressed or dejected. But is it easily said than done?

I was advised to start using daily affirmations but I was just as skeptical as the others. In my mind, I am thinking that positive affirmation only for the weaklings. So I definitely didn’t believe in chanting daily positive affirmations to oneself like some fool!

I can’t believe it when my therapist suggested that I give myself positive self talk. Actually, if he wasn’t a reputable scientist, I might not believe him.The truth is I had some deep-seated psychological problems which I have to work out. I really had the urge to stop going  to him for therapy.

After several visits and devotedly following what he told me to do, I finally realized that saying a positive affirmation every time you feel stressed out and negative can easily change habitual thought patterns into more functional ones. A positive affirmation can take you out from malaise or even a chronic state of depression. Yes, while it is hard to get yourself to believe positive affirmations at first, when you start to repeat them often enough you will come to accept them completely.

Positive thought patterns take over when they are forcibly introduced to the mind. It is a way of focusing on positive thoughts. Think positively and you  will live more positively. It is a long and patient process that in turn will make you feel relaxed and will guide your everyday life. It’s not an overnight magic, over weeks and months, you’ll feel your thoughts changing substantially. If daily you’d tell yourself positive affirmations, you will feel less afraid to make decisions and make changes in your life. This shall be the beginning of a deeper change in yourself.

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Positive Psychology

Friday, November 28th, 2008

We often think that psychology is best left to psychologists, and that if our lives and our relationships with others are messed up, we’d better see a psychologist to address that. Some people believe that there is a stigma attached to seeing a psychologist, or that we can not afford this luxury, we do not want to go. We continue on the right path, we are always dissatisfied with what we believe is a messed up existing.

Very often, these situations are fixable, all on our own. What is the secret? Apply the simple concept of positive psychology to your life and your relationships with others. It is simply a matter of changing gears with your emotional response and thinking before you speak. Let’s see how easy and rewarding this strategy of self-help can be.

Those who operate on a negative attitude are using self defeating strategy. It’s the old story of the glass being a half full or half empty. A negative attitude always produces a negative result as well as negative outlook on life. Positive Psychology is a technique in which you are looking for the best result, giving yourself and others the benefit of the doubt. If you expect the worst, you’ll usually find it.

See an example of the concept of positive psychology. Your child  drops a platter of fancy  hors d ‘oeuvres, tripping over the dog lying on the kitchen floor. You spent all day creating these fancy treats. With a negative psychology, you might come Unglued, punish your child for clumsiness, followed by a statement that your party is now in ruins.

What’s the resul ? Your child feels bad and guilty, may begin crying or may resent you. You are in a big tizzy. Over what? Your guests will still arrive and presumably you pull yourself together and put on a good face. You’ll pull out a bag of chips, and maybe a box store-bought chicken wings from the freezer and hastily whip up some dip. The party is happening and everyone lives through this disaster.

Now we will look and see how the application of positive psychology can create an entirely different result. Your child still trips over the dog,your appoeetizers are history. You tell your child not to worry about it. That’s it, too bad. We will again. Put this dog out. Your child is not crying or angry. Replace your masterpiece appetizers as possible. When your guests arrive, tell them why Rover is in the doghouse – to make a joke of it. Believe me, they laugh too. Been there, done that.

You can see that the use of positive psychology is easy and the result is transformed into a time when there is no conflict or unhappiness. Is not that what we all want? Try it, you’ll like it!

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Leader of All Times

Monday, October 6th, 2008

In these chaotic times when many of the political leaders are all bickering for the power and fame of being elected in the office, how do we choose the right kind of leader?

Great leaders always forge the country to move onwards,  establishing a style of management and providing correction and regulation if necessary. He is passionate about serving the needs of others . In our continuous search  of a great leader, here are some character and traits that leaders must possess. In an article written by Karin Syren entitled ” Elements of Timeless Leadership” , she has likened the leader to a shepherd, and to his subordinates as the sheep.

  • The shepherd recognizes the sheep are not his to do with as he pleases. He understands the sheep are not a tool, a means to an end, but a resource charged to his care. He is empowered, entrusted by another; responsible, and answerable to one who has greater authority. As an effective leader, he understands not only what it means to be a leader, but what it means to follow as well. Understanding and acceptance of the cycle cultivates and reinforces character.
  • The sheep hear, recognize and follow the voice of their shepherd. People naturally navigate to the familiar. Trust develops with experience gained in relationships. We have often heard that familiarity breeds contempt, but it also breeds trust and, with time and consistency, strengthens expectations.
  • The shepherd knows the sheep intimately and is able to call each by name. Shepherds use a system of sounds, clicks and hisses to call the sheep, slightly different for each of the sheep in the flock and every sheep knows and responds to the specific sound which is his. Consistent caring proximity is always recognized and always produces results. Relationship is the key – there is no such thing as an absentee shepherd.
  • The shepherd always leads the sheep into the safest, most beneficial conditions available and always away from harm. Strategically, he goes out before them, out of harm, into safety – but always maintaining the lead. He never expects the sheep to move into circumstances he is not willing to withstand among them, rather always expecting more of himself than he would of those in his charge.
  • The shepherd is willing to put the immediate needs and well-being of the sheep before his own, often at great personal risk. The well-being of those entrusted to him is paramount to the shepherd. This singularity of purpose encourages his decisions to be always grounded in integrity. The shepherd is prepared to lay down his life both literally and figuratively.
  • There is a difference between a hired hand and a shepherd. A hired hand is motivated by compensation. A shepherd has a deep and committed interest in the sheep. He is one who is responsible for what is not his – - by his own choice. And his relationship is characterized by longevity and consistent presence, with or without significant compensation. The shepherd is at all times ready to lay down his life for the sheep. How much more the leader for the people entrusted to him. People are a sacred trust and serving them is an awesome commission.

    The true shepherd understands the critical difference between power, often stolen and generally imposed oppressively upon the unsuspecting, and authority, which speaks of responsibility and answerability to a higher power.

The picture of a leadership is a simple image that the wise and the brilliant can comprehend. However, it’s more than intellectual ability that a leader should have, it’s passion and dedication to serve selflessly!

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